That is how it feels when I communicate with my husband. Cancer sucks.. he struggles daily with the pain of healing, and the absolute fear of the unknown. How is everything going to work??
He has a follow up doctors appointment next month and has repeatedly told me he is going to punch his surgeon “ right in the face”! So of course I planned to go with him but this time he has decided that he wants to attend this one on his own!
So now besides having a very depressed, angry lover I have to worry that he is going to get thrown in the slammer because he is so unhappy with the situation.
I understand his fear, embarrassment and discomfort! I get to listen to the men in his life ask him stupid questions.. “ have you plowed your wife lately?” Or my fav is “it working yet?” My brother actually had a conversation with my man about how “ sexual” I am and that he had better invest in some aids to keep me happy!! I am not impressed!
Why are men so cruel to each other?
My days are spent keeping him focused on healing and keeping his motivation on moving forward, getting him back to work, spending as much quality time together with him, and doing all the things a wife can do to support the function of his penis.
Yes ladies help is needed with the manipulation of the organ to stretch the penis shaft and help the blood flow return to engorge the organ. While healing there has been no erections and this is where the mental health issues enter into play.
The damage from having a catheter in over 2 weeks alone takes time to heal from and the muscles and soft tissue damage caused by the surgery itself . Shooting pain is still a constant and walking is hard for him some days!
Add the worry and fear that he has lost the use of his penis and there is no mental peace, I have reached out to family, organizations and medical professionals all in the search of mental solutions .. how can I help him??